Thursday, January 22, 2009

(Cliche alert) I needed to start focus on her needs not just mine.

In response to the last post At All Times asked:

"I get this on occassions, but mostly in the bedroom, was there a time for you when it was the same for you, and what happened to change this, for your wife to take this outside the bedroom."

Sure there was. I think initially my wife thought this was just a fad. This was reinforced when I went through periods of not being fully committed to FLR. I don't wear a device and sometimes if I came home really exhausted from work and just needed to rest for a while I wasn't so enthusiastic about helping out etc... Add two young kids and we'd then slip back into the old routine of 50/50 etc....

Then time would pass by where I realise I'm not happy without FLR, and she's not happy with me being grumpy and unhelpful around the house.

I'd then broach the subject again, but most recently promised to myself not to pressure her and focus on serving her best I can. I am also careful not to make her feel like I expect something of her or else this puts pressure on her. I (almost) never use words like slave or anything derogatory that could think it's all too far fetched. Instead I enjoy giving her pedicures, foot rubs etc.... she's delighted to see how much I enjoy it and she takes satisfaction from having me serve her.

As she became more comfortable with this being a normal part of her life she realises that normal daily life is much better for both of us when she acknowledges her place as boss.

Friday, January 16, 2009

some things we do

What have we done that isn't vanilla?

- sex almost always beings with me massaging/kissing her feet/body
- she'll have me lick her ass while she uses a dildo
- she'll have me kiss/lick her feet while she plays with her dildo. (she also likes me inside but I don't last long since she became boss. I just get far too excited!)
- when she allows me to come she often likes me standing at the end of the bed with one leg up on the bed so she can see better She then needs me to come in my hands and lick it.
- I'll wash her in the shower. Kneel down to scrub her legs, feet. Kiss her feet and pussy. I love looking up at her face while kneeling before her.
- as she's blow drying her hair I'll massage her shoulders. Then rub lotion on her legs/feet, followed by being allowed to kiss her feet and very briefly her pussy/anus.
- once at a hotel function we snook out to a (somewhat) private area downstairs. I knelt before her kissing her feet through her sandals and masturbated.
- I'll occasionally paint her toenails
- she'll spank me when misbehaved
- if we ever argue she'll say "who's the boss?" and then occasionally have me kiss her feet.
- she can demand a foot massage at any time. I've never refused.
- she likes to make me masturbate in ways which are semi-public or have my naked butt against the window when doing it in a hotel.
- I'll put on her shoes as we leave the house.
Not all the above are done on a regular basis.I work long hours in a senior management position and she raises two kids under 3 who don't like sleeping. Our FLR life is occasionally forgotten due to stress etc..
The only prop we use is her dildo. It's all very much based aroun
d worshipping her.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

I love a good shave

Although I hated the idea of doing it at first, I now love a god shave. The act of doing it makes me feel incredibly submissive. My wife much prefers it as it helps remind me who's in charge.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

BJs vs Oral

I know guys are meant to love blow jobs but I've always preferred giving oral. I don't know what it is about it. Perhaps it's just the strong submissive element to it. I told my wife that I much rather give than receive oral sex. She hasn't give me a BJ in years but I lick her out every time we have sex now.

It's one of my favourite things in life. I feel so good being down there between he thighs pleasuring her.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Clooney wanted some femdom action too...

Tarantino has a major foot fetish

This scene was a major trigger for me in realising how much I loved femdom:

Here he openly admits his foot fetish:

Here are selected scenes from his movies where he focuses on feet:

Not ready for a device

I saw the CB-3000 Curve in a shop last week and almost bought it. However it looked so uncomfortable I couldn't imagine myself wearing it underneath my suit all day. From reading online reviews, many users claim that it's uncomfortable and can be painful. Has anyone here any experience with it?

Disappointing her

Sometimes she'll have me go inside of her. Unfortunately by this time I'm so excited I come in about 2mins, to her dismay. I hate to see her so disappointed. At times I feel like I should get a strap on so I can satisfy her longer. Before acknowledging femdom when we had completely vanilla sex life I was able to last much longer. Now I get so excited so quickly I literally can't contain myself.

Has anyone any advice on how to deal with this in a LFA relationship?

Has anyone got a strap on to give their wives the pleasure of penetrative sex?

Typical sex at the moment

At the moment we're both pretty tired much of the time so sex is about once every 1-2 weeks :(

Usually I offer her a foot massage followed by her asking for a full body massage. I start getting excited and kissing her feet.

Me kissing her feet is a big turn on for her. Sometimes she'll ask me to lick her downstairs, sometimes she'll take out her dildo and demand I continue kissing/licking her feet while she brings herself to orgasm. She'll have me suck her toes and push her feet all over my face while she touches herself. This is soooo exciting for both of us.

Sometimes she'll make me eat my own cum. As you know the though of this is really exciting before ejaculation but instantly diminishes once I cum. However, I get excited again by the her wanting me to do it.

Biggest Femdom Killer

Our LFA lifestyle had been going really well until we had our first kid.
All of a sudden our peace and quiet was gone. She's a stay at home mom. I'm a busy executive with a lot of responsibility at work and often come home from the office exhausted and without any enthusiasm for LFA or helping around the house.
Add a second kid 18 months later and you've got two exhausted people who aren't paying a whole lot of attention to their sex life anymore. LFA becomes an afterthought.

That's pretty much where we're at right now. We both know she's in charge but it's not the LFA lifestyle we used to have.

I know that more housework etc... would make a big difference to her and show her I'm serious about LFA outside of the bedroom, however when I come home so tired and start changing diapers I'm just not up to it.

At the moment our sex life pretty much consist of .....

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Famous women love femdom too... pt. 2

Cindy Crawford
Howard: "Goodbye Cindy" (Kisses Hand)
Cindy: "Aren't you going to kiss my foot?"
Howard: "Oh you want me to kiss your foot? Here give me your foot, give me your foot!"
Radio DJ Howard Stern

Kari Wuhrer
Question: "At what point in a relationship would you let a guy suck your toes?"
Kuhrer: "First date. Are you kidding?"
Kari Wuhrer-Maxim Online Chat

Leelee Sobieski
Interviewer: "What is your favorite scene in the film?"
Sobieski: "I like when he (Klien) kisses my feet"
Leelee Sobieski-API Interview, 'Here on Earth'

Jessica Simpson
"I even took off my shoes just for him. I think it's a cute fetish..."
Jessica Simpson in "JoJo Wright show"

Famous women love femdom too...

Jolie, Spears, Stone, Electra, Madonna etc.........
love to have men kiss their feet.
We don't have to feel weird anymore. Lots and lots of celebrities have admitted to having men kiss their feet. Short snippets pop up in the media here and there', but nobody sees them all together. Here's some I came across:

Britney Spears
Russell Gilbert show:
Q: "What is your Favorite seduction?"
A: "for a guy to kiss my feet..."
(Don't believe me? Watch her say it:)

Jenny McCarthy:
"My boyfriend's a real foot man... he loves to look at mine. I walk around without a top on and he's looking at my $3 pedicure. Sometimes there's toe-sucking, it just depends what kind of mood we're in." from TV Guide Online, Fall '99

Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thorton in the July 5, 2001 "Rolling Stone"
Thornton kisses her foot.
"I have a foot thing," she says.
"We have a whole foot thing," he says.

Sharon Stone:
"Some men know how to remind women that we are the fairer sex. They know how to rub a gal's pretty feet" Sharon Stone-Esquire Magazine

[Madonna quote when questioned about the toe sucking back cover of Erotica]
Madonna: "Sure I like to suck toes, but prefer to have my toes sucked...(gigle)"

Elisabeth Rohm, in the June issue of "GQ, " pg. 222
"Now I can tell you something dirty.
I like men who have a foot fetish.
I absolutely think it's the most charming thing.
It's just so romantic."

AOL Live Chat: "What is your idea of a fun date?"
Carmen Electra: "Shrimping. It's another word for toe sucking."

More to follow soon.

Intimacy & Caring

In a comment on my previous post Candace asked:

"But how do you categorize this act as one of submission rather than one of intimacy and caring?"

Submission can be intimate and caring. In fact, that's my favorite form of submission. I don't relate to many of the images or stories I read on women being in charge.

To me, most femdom art is far too focused on pain--which I don't have much interest in (apart from a little spanking, and I don't even like that to get too painful)

Although I've no problem with it, I'm not interested in leather, chains and whips etc..

I prefer to provide caring, intimate servitude to my wife.

I'm happy to answer your question and keep sending them my way.

Morning routine.

I love when my wife makes me give her a footrub before she even gets out of bed. When we have time (once or twice a week) I'll get in the shower with her. I drop straight to my knees and start washing one of her legs. I love looking up in her eyes as I do it. I then wash the other leg and she places a foot on my lap for me to wash it. She then has me wash her other foot.

She'll make me wash her pubic area and rear, first with soap and after rinsing with water, I clean these areas with my tongue. She'll then have me wash her armpits and back before I towel her down when she gets out of the shower.

As she sits at her dressing table blowdrying her hair, I start to massage body cream into her shoulders and back. I'll then drop to me knees and massage her legs and feet, while she's still doing her hair. When she gets up she usually allows me a brief kiss of her pubic area followed by a quick lick of her rear.

I then thank her.

Oh, how I love it!

I tried to forget about letting my wife being in charge again.
I tried to suppress my feelings. We went back to the (bad)old 50/50. For a couple of weeks I managed to block it out of my mind.

However, no matter how much I tried to ignore it, it just kept coming back. After a while I started offering foot rubs and lots of oral pleasure. It wasn't too long before we were living LFA again.

My wise wife told me to stop trying to figure out why I love her being the boss and just accept it.

How did we get started in LFA?

A few months after we started dating I couldn't resist during foreplay to kneel before her submissively and provide oral pleasure. Occasionally, I was cheeky enough to start kissing her feet. Over time I became more and more confident in offering footrubs and again I couldn't resist kissing her feet.

Of course she was curious and I just had to tell her that it really turned me on and that I enjoyed doing it. I felt very guilty and embarassed about it, not to mention my fear that she would reject me for not being a "real man."

I left open on my computer a few times hoping she see it, have a browse through it and bring up the subject, but she never noticed it.

I had to tell her there was a website I wanted to read out to her. We sat up in bed and I read to her from my laptop. I could see her face starting to light up.

We trialed it for a week and it went FANTASTIC! We were both so HAPPY. But then I got freaked out and started worrying too much about what might go wrong.

1) Since the relationship entails bringing more sexual energy into the relationship my wife complained that I was too interested in sex, that my whole life had become about sex, and that it's all I could think about. Yes it was true.

2) It I went a few days being teased without ejaculation I wasn't able to maintain a proper erection in order to give her satisfactory pleasure. I'm a healthy 29 year old man who normally has no problem, but once I became extremely submissive I just couldn't get it up and if I did, I'd have a premature ejaculation.

3) I noticed that many (although certainly not all) websites discussing female led marriage discuss cuckoldry. Once I discovered my own inability to please my wife and her disappointment I started to understand why. I know for certain that is a line I don't want to cross and I'm afraid that if we continued with a female led marriage, and my inability to maintain erection, I could easily end up getting excited by the idea and wanting to introduce her to it.

We decided to go back to our (bad)old 50/50

It's so relieving to find information on Loving Female Authority on the internet. When I first became aware of my deep desire to submit to dominant women I struggled with feelings of guilt. I felt that there must be something wrong with me.

Knowing that so many other people live this lifesytle helped me accept myself and feel better about myself. It also helped me pluck up the courage to introduce the concept to my wife. It's so good to feel at peace with this acceptance.

More to follow on how I got my wife to accept LFA