Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Big News - part 1
I have some big news.
Where do I start? I guess I should have a recap on where we are to date. My wife and I met through vanilla dating 7 years ago. Although I can remember submissive thoughts from my early teens, I'd never discussed them with any partner. I knew she was the one for me and proposed after 3 months. Because I felt so close to her I was able to soon open up about my submissive fantasies in the bedroom. We occasionally indulged but it certainly wasn't an acknowledge female led relationship.
I started reading more online and wasn't sure if I wanted more than just bedroom games. I didn't like the idea of having to do more household chores etc and be at her beck and call. So we occasional played with her being the boss in bed. Eventually I plucked up the courage to order Around Her Finger - The New Brides Guide To Training Her Husband. I read it to her aloud in bed, she liked it and agreed to a week of bootcamp. We both enjoyed it and decided it have a female led relationship. Sometimes things were great, other times she forgot about FLR and didn't pay attention to the intimate part of it. As a result I'd resort to too much self pleasure, take my attention off her, daily life gets in the way and before we know it FLR was a thing of the past.
This seemed to switch on and off every once in a while, although never managing to continue FLR properly for more than a few weeks because it got forgotten about. I think it has to get to a certain point to become a continuous thing. As you can see from some of my older posts there are hot and cold periods and of course long gaps. In the long gaps nothing FLR happened apart from her taking charge during sex. If there were periods with less intimacy between us I just pleasured myself. Our daily life was vanilla and we were both a little irritable with each other. I was somewhat grumpy and she would get annoyed with me very easily.
By looking at my own blog entries I can see that it was Sept 10th when I decided to make a concerted effort to revitalise FLR between us. My first step was to dramatically reduce my self pleasure and focus my energy on her by starting to offer her nightly foot rubs again and during this time remind her that she's the boss.